A different sales pitch.
Many of life simpler problems like stress, anxiety, worry, fear, panic, feeling bad about something can easily be changed. We can develop the maturity to choose how to feel about the events that we find in our lives, that we contribute to, or just happened to us. Or that at one time we wanted and now realise was the wrong choice or no longer for us.
It’s not a new idea Epictetus, Marcus Aurelius, Seneca and many modern stoics (Tim Ferriss, Ryan Holiday just to mention two) all are this way. It is our choice how we allow external events to effect us. It is up to us to gain the necessary mental and emotional skills and tools and systems that we need to achieve our outcomes. Modern Stoicism and eft go very well together.
It is up to us when we find we are lacking to have systems in place that allow us to recognise this, analyse the situation, and work out sensible actions to take or not to take to fix the problems, glitches and challenges, or learning experiences. If they can’t then we go to plan B.
Just for the fun of it.
One must find out for oneself, and make sure beyond doubt, who one is, what one is, why one is ...Being thus conscious of the proper course to pursue, the next thing is to understand the conditions necessary to following it out. After that, one must eliminate from oneself every element alien or hostile to success, and develop those parts of oneself which are specially needed to control the aforesaid conditions. (Crowley, Magick, Book 4 p.134)
Yet up until recently we did not have fast, simple, effective ways to gain control of our thoughts, emotions and feelings yet intelligent self hypnosis NLP and EFT and rare sense (common sense is not common) allow us to take stoicism and really use it in todays world.
Modern updates to ancient philosophy.
This may surprise you especially if you are experiencing emotional problems. However it’s true. Yet you have a variety of simple glitches to fix that you run, that if changed would dramatically improve the quality of your life. Might even change the course of your life.
Sounds like magic, it is. In my youth I studied many systems of Magick, religion and Yoga and very few worked. The one’s that do, I still use.
Due to the planet we live on and the fact that many of us were born into or choose to be social animals we have all been trained or programmed or conditioned since birth to conform to local rules so that we can usually fit in and be part of a society.
This is a good thing and allows us and those around us and those who control us to have an easer life and gives them greater power and also allows us to play the role of a powerless victim blaming our education, our sex, age, partners, family, friends or whoever for how we feel and what we are doing in our lives.
“What good fortune for governments that the people do not think”. “Most people do not know what they want, it is to those of us who do to give it to them”.
Along the way our parents, and social and religious conditioning along with educational directives are all loaded into us, of course they are years out of date. Story, myths, lies, misunderstandings, fears, worries, how to be a good victim and a good member of society.
“To hell with circumstances: I create opportunities”. Bruce Lee.
When we are young and have very little power and totally depend on others and have no life skills or knowledge and lack the emotional control or maturity to understand what’s going on. Our minds are plastic and are formed by the things and people around us. Rightly so.
Due to this we are loaded with un-truths, lies, threats, fear, guilt, assumptions, ignorance and superstation, misunderstandings and rules that are sensible for children but totally redundant for adults. Many of our beliefs have not been updated since childhood, just imagine using a computer that is 20-30 years out of date.
Now imagine a computer that was copied from a previous computer (our parents or family members or old religions) that was 400 years out of date.
If we keep all the unhelpful stuff we won’t be emotionally well adjusted, contented and happy adults, at cause in our lives, designing our lives, enjoying our life. Just look around you for the truth of this.
How many people do you know who are happy and successful (what ever that means to you) and excited about life. Yet, with the necessary skills your mind can be as plastic in adulthood as it was when you were a child.
A leopard might not be able to change it’s spots. But adults can.
When attempting to make a personal change in your life it’s a big thing, yet very few people put much time, research and thinking into wanting the change, deciding to do it and then doing what is necessary to do it. Stress anxiety and worry, now that’s a different thing. Many people will spend days doing this.
Now, some people will get a change almost instantly. Call it luck, the placebo effect, god, mother nature, evolution, genetics, hypnosis or aliens. Some will get the result as if by magic. I am really pleased magick exists.
However, many people want a change and try for a while to change and fall flat on there arse. They may have been told by well meaning yet lazy thinkers.
“If at first you don't succeed, try, try, try again”.
A bit different from another person who said
“Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results”.
His way of thinking did get different results and that is what it boils down to.
Your habitual thinking.
I, of course want you to change and get the results you want in your life. However, I also want the process to be as easy as possible for both of us. Much misunderstanding exists about personal change. Much of it you can do on your own or with correct training.
For now, just realise that the bottom line is and with only a few exceptions.
Your thoughts, your emotions, what you think and feel directs your life, how you live and what you experience.
“We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what we pretend to be.”
― Kurt Vonnegut, Mother Night.
And you, and only you are responsible for the thoughts that live in your mind. Things may happen to you, unpleasant things. Yet. as Epictetus once said
“What really frightens and dismays us is not the external events themselves, but the way in which we think about them”
If that’s a bit high brow.
It’s not the problem that’s the problem. Your attitude about the problem is the problem. Savy?
Captain Jack Sparrow.
Emotional Freedom Techniques are very useful in learning about this and allow you to very quickly, with practice to understand and experience that your thoughts are not real and that the emotions you experience don’t have to last for long.
You can learn to direct your mind and emotions, and understand how and why you do what you do. You can learn to let go of old habits, behaviours and opinions that no longer serve you. To load in new ones that will allow you to enjoy life more.
It will mean that you will have to learn new things and change parts of your life. Some things you will have to let go of. The joy is you learn new ways of being, new habits become as automatic as the old ones.
Of course if you just want to sleep better, loose a few pounds and feel better in your life that can be done as well. It’s up to you how far you take responsibility for your life, what you choose to become.