EFT although amazing in what it will allow you to do has, I personally feel has not always been presented in a way that is most beneficial for the "client who have much work to do". Garry Graig has formulated a system that will get excellent results for most people if they do the basic drills as advised.
People like to be told things are simple, easy and require little effort, that tells you something about how people are, and thats OK. ( In the real world sometimes we have other stuff to do, just take a look at what I had to do to remove a fear about riding a bike and fixing a computer.)
However, the gentle huggy approach is not always the best approach with some people. They are after all, learning to become different and unless you change how you think, feel and behave. Nothing changes. The change may just be to do the drills, for many that is all it takes to remove a problem they may have had for years.
Telling it as it is, Is one such area that can cause glitches with some people.
In order to dissolve or blow out an energetic or emotional blockage or problem, you tell it as it is. What is bothering you and the key is to say it as it is? Then we get “specific”. Occasionally I come across clients who need a little help in this area.
Many, many, many years ago I went to Relate, the marriage guidance service with one of the ladies in my life. At the time we were having problems communicating, isn't it amazing how communication is often involved in relationship problems and usually it is because we don't know our own rules or our partners.
This advisor a lovely lady, asked us to explain how we felt and what our concerns were and to be honest with ourselves and each other, as that was they only way we could move foreword and resolve our problems.
Well, you may have an idea as to what happened when it was my turn. I was honest and expressed my feelings and emotions as I truly felt them. It caused offence and deep emotional responses from the advisor, not from my partner.
Apparently telling it as it is, or how I saw it, was not acceptable in that situation or environment. It is different with emotional freedom techniques. The more honest you can be with yourself the greater your results will be, and it allows you to tap into what is really bothering you.
This will often involve some very colourful language, profanities and strong words. It is after all emotions that are causing you problems.
So when you are doing the drills, be honest with what you are truly feeling and thinking, no one is around. So if inside your mind you are swearing and abusing your self, and feeling like you want to X. Say it. Express it fully and be free from the problem.
Self honesty and understanding are the keys to personal happiness and personal power. Garry Greg knows that, that is why in your set up phrase you also say " love accept and appreciate myself"
From that view point you can move on. So if your drills are not working as well as they should, are you being honest with yourself or are you lying to your self and making excuses, or have other benefits to keeping your problem? Many of us do, and it's ok however you may have to look just a little deeper and tap on it.
Remember earlier I said. "isn't it amazing how communication is often involved in relationship problems" Well, the closest relationship you will ever have is. "your relationship with you". The relationship you have with yourself is always with you, thats why you need to be honest when you do your drill to get the most results.
So what happened when my partner at the time and I left relate? Once we stopped laughing, my partner said ."she wasn't much F-ing good, lets fix it ourselves and play" I like to think that our advisor was a very experienced and switched on one, She broke our state, made us laugh and giggle and allowed us to realise that we could work it out. So we did.